“Go wash the dishes!”
“Go take out the garbage!”
“Go fold the clothes!”
“Go make me coffee!”
“Go do the laundry!”
“Go hang the clothes!”
“Go bring me my purse so I can give you money!”
“Juan wants to buy 30 pounds of candy-“
“I had 10 chocolate bars. I ate 9 of them. What do I have now?”
Only reblogging because I’m a greedy bitch who wants money.
Hey doesn’t hurt to reblog ya knoww and if money is involved….
My mom’s paycheck arrives in 4d days, THIS SHIT WORKKSS
chinese feng shui knows about tumblr ?
random gif time :3
MY BIRTHDAY IS IN JULY….YOU JELLY?
- Bring some books to class and read them instead of paying attention or doing any work.
- Walk around class begging for spare change.
- Chew on your arm until someone notices.
- Change seats every time the teacher turns his/her back.
- After the teacher explains something, laugh really loud and say “Oh, now I get it!”
- Lick yourself clean like a cat does.
- After the teacher has explained something, say “Quite right, old bean” in the typical old english style.
- Sing your questions to the class.
- When the teacher calls roll, after each name scream “THAT’S MEEEEE!!! Oh, no, sorry.”
- Page through the textbook scratching each picture and sniffing it.
- Stare continually at the teacher’s private areas. Occasionally lick your lips.
- Address the teacher as “your honour”.
- Sit in the front, sniff suspiciously, and ask the teacher if he’s been drinking.
- Present the teacher with a large fruit basket.
- Ask for an extra copy of each handout, for your invisible friend sitting next to you.
- Claim that you wrote the class textbook.
- Stand to ask questions. Bow deeply before taking your seat after the teacher answers.
- Laugh loudly at everything the teacher says. Be sure to snort and make weird noises while you laugh.
- When the teacher turns their back to the class, scream and bang desks, then when they turn around act normal and get on with your work. - Kaz
- Get everyone in the class to start humming softly, and gradually hum louder. - Mr Magoo
- Have a group of people in different parts of the classroom in on the hum scheme. To work it, one person hums until the teacher looks at them, whereupon someone else starts humming and the accused opens his mouth as says “I wasn’t humming!”. Rinse and repeat until teacher loses mind. - jw
- At a completely random time, put up your hand to ask a question. When the teacher picks you, ask a question about a different subject and pretend you thought it was that class.
- Put your hand up, and when the teacher acknowledges you, just say “I’m pointing at the ceiling”.
- When a substitute introduces himself as a substitute, have you and your friends all yell “FRESH MEAT!!!!” at the same time.
- Raise your hand as if to ask a question, then just say ‘buh buh bah buh buh buh?’ or similar nonsense. Then act like the teacher should get it.
- Say you’re invisible and when people say you’re not, start crying.
- Superglue a coin to the ground and watch people try to pick it up.
- While the teacher is writing, hide the board rubber. When he/she goes to get somebody (like the principal), replace it in the same place & make him/her look insane.
- Tell your teacher that you don’t do homework because it’s against your religion.
- Listen to what the teacher says, and pick out a word that is said often, like “the”. Each time the word is said, run a circle around your desk laughing and clapping loudly.
- Each student say “chop!” when the teacher calls the roll, then when the last student’s name is called the class yells “Timber!” and they all fall out of their desks onto the floor.
- Whenever the teacher speaks to you, act like you’re terrified of him/her and go run & hide in the corner or under your desk.
- Go up to the teacher but face the empty space next to him/her and ask if you can go to the office to get your medicine for hallucinations.
- As soon as the bell rings to start class, crawl under your desk and huddle with yourself and grab onto your chair and scream like you saw your grandma’s butt. (Brianna White)
- Start clapping, but keep a steady beat. When other people start clapping, start singing opera. (cheesebaboon)
- Draw a smiley face on a piece of paper, and talk to it. (JH)
- Refuse to do any work until the whole class has put on rubber gloves for fear of lead poisioning. (sarah)
- Bring some candles, an ouji board and matches into the class on the day of a test. Before the test starts, set the candles in a circle and light them. Sit in the middle of the circle with the ouji board and claim you are trying to channel the spirit of Einstein. (sarah)
- In class when the teacher is talking, pretend you’re not paying attention and if she picks you to anwser, say “So the Rhino did go to the beach with the Elephant”. (Masta)
- When the class is silent, put your book on the desk and fart on it. (JMS)
- Ask questions while trying not to use any nouns or make any sense. ex: I have a question: When you said that we should get that thing over there with the stuff on it, did you mean the thing that, you know, had the stuff with the (mumbles) … over there… .Well, do you? (nsrt)
- While taking a test, get up about halfway through and point at the teacher or someone random and scream “You ruined christmas” and then storm out of the room, slamming the door on your way out. (ScottBaioFan)
- Repeat everything the teacher says right after him/her to confirm that you agree. When they ask you to stop, say “but I love you so!!” (jacob khan)
- Raise your hand in such a way that it looks a little bit like you’re just stretching (like you’re a little tired) but more like you want to ask a question. When the teacher goes to answer your question (even when you don’t have a question), just say you were stretching. Repeat as often as necessary. (the butt)
- When the teacher turns his/her attention to you and calls you to answer the question, act as if you’re an undercover agent and refuse to give information. (TetraMorph)
- When forced to type up an essay or project, put the whole thing in one of those whacky fonts (the ones that are all symbols and the sort) then act confused when your teacher can’t understand it. - The Otter King
- Every time your teacher asks a question, raise your hand and answer with the word “salmon”. Have your friends join in and even have people in different class periods do it. - j$
- When a teacher asks you a question, stand up and walk up to her/him (if the teacher is bigger than you, stand on tip toes) and square the teacher up. After 10 seconds, turn around and run out of the room. - Gaza Boy
- When you have a 2000 word essay due, hand in two pictures related to the topic. After all, a picture is worth a thousand words, right? - Optik
- When a teacher asks you for your homework, angrily exclaim that you are a member of Greenpeace or the Earth Liberation Front, and that the mass slaughter of innocent trees is unacceptable. - Optik
- During a note-taking lesson or activity, or at any time during the class, try to take offense to anything the teacher says. If the teacher doesn’t use politically correct terms, take offense to it, even though it doesn’t even concern you. Even take offense to random things like “Jamaica” and “the pythagorean theorem”. - Maxipax
- When the teacher leaves the room, tie a knot in the straw in their coffee. - yoimabutthead
- Raise your hand, and when the teacher calls on you, ask where babies come from in a childish voice. - Bitch
- When a teacher explains something, raise your hand and say “I don’t get it”. They’ll say, “What don’t you get?” You look at the handout or notebook paper you have and say, “How do they make a really big tree into this thin piece of paper?” - Katie
- Pick one of your teachers that constantly uses a specific word (ex: I have a teacher that says “Okay?” after almost every sentence). Get everybody in the class to stand up, clap, and sit down every time that word is used. - DeusExMachina
- Just randomly stand up excitedly and yell some random-ass comment towards the teacher. Like, “I like your pants!” in a dandy, yet excited and confident manner. Then just sit down as if nothing ever happened. - Nick
- Raise your hand and ask to go to the nurse and say, “I SEE DEAD PEOPLE.” -
- Look ahead in the textbook and learn the info. When your teacher is trying to teach it, raise your hand and give away the whole lesson in like 30 seconds.
- After being given an important assignment, blatantly stick it in your mouth and take a bite out of it.
- When the teacher hands out an assignment, put your shoes on your hands and attempt to do your work while whining about how hard it is. If the teacher tries to say anything, say, “You don’t know me!” and run away crying. Works best with numerous people.